You cannot make relationships work

Source: From internet.  

'Perhaps you will fall in love with many people over the course of your life, but you cannot marry them all.

Some are personality infatuations.
Some represent real connections that could not be brought into being because the people were not ready or mature enough to participate effectively together.
In the moment, you will not know what is what.
So be careful about letting yourself become so infatuated with anyone.
Do not want and try to be in love.
That is blind and foolish.
There are many people who could excite the deeper passions of the heart with whom you could never function together.
You can be in love with someone whose values are so different from yours that you could not stand to be together beyond the initial romantic phase.
You will constantly be arguing, constantly in friction, constantly disagreeing, constantly maladapting to each other.
People fall in love and get married without any idea of what they are doing in their lives or where they are going.
They just assume if you are in love you should be married.
It is a great mistake.
You might feel spontaneous love for someone, but do not let yourself go overboard with that.
In relationship, you are choosing your primary influence.
You are assigning the person to be your chief influence, your chief advisor.
It is a practical arrangement, not just an emotional one.
Do not think if you work hard enough, if you love enough, you will make it all work.
This is foolishness.
You will have to work at relationship, certainly, to a degree.
You will have to adapt, certainly, to a degree.
You will have to relinquish some of your personal freedoms and recklessness to be in a real relationship, of course.
You will have to be attentive.
You will have to be honest.
You will have to be engaged.
But people take this to mean that they can make a relationship work with someone whom they want for themselves, and this is a cruel error.
To be swept along by impressions and infatuations, to allow yourself to be seduced by others, to be overtaken by beauty, wealth or charm is such a form of self-betrayal.
It is such a dangerous involvement.
It has such profoundly difficult and unfortunate consequences.
You have to be very careful here.
Who you associate with and how you associate with them has all the bearing for your life and for the kind of life you will have and the opportunities you will have.'
~ Marshall Summers

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