Gwa case timeline

 8th Oct 2021 - travelled at 3:15-730am from chandigarh to Delhi to file the petition. Advocate and his assistant explained some of the lines in my petition that they wanted to remove.

17th Nov 2021 - 

first date of the court. The plan was to tell court that I am undergoing immense suffering and so is the child. The request was 

a) to grant ex parte ad interim relief to allow 10 mins daily video calls 

b) to issue summons through all modes which includes email and whatsapp. Advocate need to send on email & whatsapp and then file 65b. He has to make efforts. 

c) to recognize that the 2 yr gap is not because of my fault. 

I used past tense above because on the morning of 17th at 10:05 am, I learnt that judge is on leave. Yes, I took leave from office to travel. I had taken 3:15 am train again and stuffed myself with 2 inners, 1 sweater, 1 jacket, 1 shawl to save myself from cold and get some sleep. I was mostly sleepless in the night and rehearsing my 3 requests and had prepared multiple applications containing grounds for urgency, separation reasons summary, ad interim relief grounds and citations. I had shared with my advocate but received no response but I had enough confidence to give it to judge today if she had come. It definitely hurts a lot and one is bound to feel disappointed. It is not fair to curse God or luck. A judge is expected to go on leave with some probability which is not a rare event. So, it is possible that it happens when its your turn. I will call myself unlucky only if we can compute average of probability that judge was on leave on your date for a large sample set and show that it is much higher for me. And God is great not because he help us succeed always but because he is great in absolute way by the sheer magic of creation of whole environment and living beings and their sustainability. I am too insignificant to matter to the omnipotent God who is greater than infinity-squared. 

Coming back, if we analyze with a bigger perspective, court has already written Pf/rc which means summons would be issued by the advocate. Now the ball is in our advocate's court which would have been on a perfect day also.

On a perfect day, we would also have got exparte ad interim but to tell the truth, this was just my (total novice) idea to press for ad interim. Order 39, Rule 3 of cpc which talks about exparte temporary injunctions lays out the grounds of extreme urgency and a judge might have kicked that with single argument that child is safe with mother and ground of extreme urgency is not made out. There are other procedural complications with ad interim where opposite party needs to be informed immediately, advocate need to file affidavit of informing OP, and then interim need to be resolved in 30 days. God forbid, if I underestimate OP that they won't prefer a challenge to exparte order which can not only delay our case but also put our judge on Backfoot in granting anything in whole case.

In short, I had no hope of success in exparte even on an ideal day. That's why I had kept an application for xmas visitation which we can move even now. This ball is also in my advocate's court.

2 yr gap can be justified even now in next date. Even to request ad interim relief, we can still move an application by saying that OP is expected to delay the matters but we should not suffer and deserve relief.

Lastly, I just want to reiterate that today's disappointment and unnecessary travel could have been avoided if our court systems were efficient. It's not the fault of my luck or God but the sheer broken system which will trouble one and all.

Open qns - 

1) are child matters really urgent? 

How do you tell a court clerk. For him, maintenance is more urgent where money is not paid for the maintenance of child. If you tell him that one parent who is not able to meet basic needs of child should not have it, it is too much for him. He says even Divorce cases are very important, people want to get divorce and move on with life. A clerk does not see any urgency in child custody matters. For him, the non custodial parent better make more children with someone else. It's so easy to manufacture a new kid in 9 months than to fight wars over division of one kid. Only a parent with dagger in heart can find flaw in these saintly arguments. The clerk does not hesitate to add that obviously the judge sir would know better. After all, he is just a clerk. But he says, even judge sir is working with register of 7 month ahead ie. Giving dates 7 months ahead.

2) why maintenance execution gets 1 month dates religiously

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19th Nov - Today I prepared draft of urgent application seeking visit to child on Xmas and New year and shared with my advocate (NKS). I had told this to him on 17 nov itself that I will send you an application. I sent reminder to advocate on 23 nov, 27 nov, 29 nov through WA and finally on 30 nov he replied that I can use ecourts app to track my cases. I had to shout him about my interim application in angry tone asking if he can do it today or not. He filed my application as it is as I had sent on Dec 2.

I kept asking for another 2 weeks about any status of the application but there was no reply from Mr NKS or his minion RS. Around 16-17th Dec, they informed me of urgent application date as 21st Dec.

21st Dec 2021 - Judge was on leave today and for the whole week. From next week, courts are closed. So, this attempt has failed. I need to wait till next date of Feb 1. Advocate will not take my calls at all, will not respond to any messages. I had requested associate to try with principal judge but she  refused saying "principal judge application nhi sunn rhe h". Immense pain and suffering.

Feb 1 2022 - It was VC day. I joined via VC at 10 am but they said join at 12 pm. At 12 PM VC link did not allow me to join (as court was going and reader decided to only allow advocates). The next date was given as 30th August (after 7 months). I was obviously gutted. Definitely one of the darkest days of my life. I suffered and suffered and just lied and cried on my bed in shock whole day. The worst part was that I tried reaching out to Mr NKS by calling about 16 times between 1 pm to 9 pm but he did not pick my call, did not reply back to any of my messages. His minion who appeared in court for me told me the next date and long pendency and nothing can be done and stopped responding to any calls or messages by saying at 3:30 pm "m call nhi le pauungi. M stuck in family function, cousin marriage)". I posted in few groups about my trouble. One guy (from Hyd) called me and told me process of filing urgent application and to do it myself. Another guy, VKr, somehow gave my number to his ex-advocate and I talked to his advocate at 930 pm. That guy said no need to go to HC but file an urgent application.

I asked some basic questions to my advocate and associate like whether summons are delivered, whether court passed any order today, conversation in court and what went there. The associate also talked about "issuing of some summons/notice" to me and I assumed OP did not appear maybe.

I waited and message him again in few days asking to provide me more information. Advocate kept ignoring me. On 7th feb, he sent WA that he will apply for CC in few days as courts reopen. On 15th Feb, I again begged for 5 mins with Mr Advocate . He told me to call him at 8 pm. At 8 pm, his number was switched off. I never messaged or call again. Apna bhi self-respect hai. The stress was just too much for me in last 2 weeks and I went back to my cocoon and work for 2 weeks. By end of Feb, I prepared  document containing TnC for advocates and started reaching out to advocates. I asked all for advo's references, none replied back. I sent my offer to one good advo who refused. VKr advocate who consoled me on Feb 1 is a HC advocate and I decided to continue with him.

So, what happened on Feb 1?

AS I LEARNT LATER DURING FILE INSPECTION ON 16TH JULY 2022, THE ORDER STATED THAT RESPONDENT ADVOCATE JOINED AND COURT ORDERD TO SUBMIT WS IN 4 WEEKS & REJOINDER IN 6 WEEKS. 

I had made long written submissions and sent to court through email, but they were never taken on file as I learnt on 16th July 2022.

My advocate today should have submitted my written submissions. Since I had sent it few days before, he did not even bother to check. He should have earned a visitation today.

My advocate today should have pressed for visitation as OP counsel was also present and ex-parte was no longer required. Court should have mechanically granted visitation or setup a date in 2 days if they had any objection.  My advocate may fail for various reasons, courts should not. Court should have asked visitation chahiye, chalo bacha dekh to lo and should have given something. No advocacy skills should have been required. 

14th March 2022 - I met my advocate, paid him money, signed on vakalatnama, urgent hearing application seeking access on holi and my birthday in april. It is not clear as yet when he filed the application but he got the date for 28th March 2022. 

15th March 2022 - Informed Mr NKS that he is no longer on board. Messaged him at 2:29 am, he sent thumbs up at 4:23 am. 

28th March - I was present on that day and said I am suffering. Court said everybody in this court is suffering. I have 4000 cases. My new HC advocate sent a junior guy who does not have more than 5 yr exp. I asked him if he checked my file, he said yes. I asked him whether my Feb 1 submission was on file, he said yes. When court asked him about age of child, he asked me. I had to tell the court. I did not understand properly but probably court asked him if the process is issued to OP and they did not appear. Court said it will grant me bday access if *(maybe it was process, maybe it was appearance of OP counsel)* has happened. My advocate did not know. Court felt frustrated. I explained that I have changed my advocate. Court said they will check the file and pass orders.

[As I learnt later on 16th July 2022, court just asked for filing of PF and fixed 14 july as hearing date ]

I went through another bout of depression. Few days before and few days after the failed date are extremely hard.

Mistakes: I think process should be filed and application served on OP before the early hearing date. Otherwise, we are getting next date because of our mistake. A HC adv with 22 yrs exp. should have handled it. Let me tell you what this guy did on next date.

14th July 2022 - Date for early hearing application. My advocate filed PF and sent it to me on 30 March 2022. It has sign of alhmad. Judge was on leave from 11, 12, 13th July. ON 13th July, judge on leave was updated online at around 3 pm. Maya confused my mind and I thought judge will be on leave tomorrow also. I canceled my travel plan to save on office leave and disappointment of traveling at night to find court empty next morning. Out of my last 4 hearings, judge was on leave on two hearing, so probability was skewed. The urgent hearing application sought access on holi and bday. I made written submission about need for visitation and sought contact rights and visitation rights and sent to court with cc to advocate. Advocates as usual never look at it, never provide feedback, so you have to take action alone due to desperation. 

I had no plan to speak anything and thought let advocate handle it alone and see if this guy can be trusted. Considering all this I did not go and informed my advocate so that he knows I won't be there and he should be careful to go with proper preparation.

My advocate informed that application is dismissed today. He blamed judge and blamed me for becoming too emotional.

16th July 2022  - Went for file inspection to delhi. luckily, it got approved quickly and I could see the file. No one appeared for me on 14th July. Court put the remark that petitioner did not take any action as per directions of the court in filing process fee etc. Court dismissed application as non-pressed. Also, applied for CC.

23rd July 2022 - Went for filing IA seeking birthday access. Police had called on 22nd under Crpc 160 for FIR. Stayed overnight at uncle's house and in the morning, went to court to collect CC (which I could) and to check drogon-05 status. Then went to advocate.

8th Aug 2022 - Application was put up before judge for allowing today. Traveled overnight 3-7;30. Train came at 3:40 am instead of 3:10 am. Sleep broke and could catch some sleep only around 5 am. 2 hr of deep sleep 5-7am and tiger was ready ;) 

Turn came at last at 12:45 pm. Manish spoke two lines - I have not met my child in 3 years. She has blocked my number and I am unable to talk. 

I spoke one line that next date of hearing is 30.08 before judge stood up and went for lunch. I then told reader to put it up for 30.08 and reader said that's what judge has told him. Asked for filing of PF.

12th Aug 2022 - Due to holidays from 9-11, PF could be filed today only. Manish confirmed and shared the receipt. Generally, PF has to be filed in 3 days. Read rules.

30.08

Court disagreed on all points with me. 

My prayer read allow to meet child without negative presence of the respondent - "that cannot happen. I cannot allow you to meet child without presence of Respondent." 

Court gave a  conditional order of 15K to meet child once a month for 1.5 hrs and 2 hrs of virtual visitation.

A lot more went on this date. My advocate arguing on maintenance had no arguments and feebly prayed for 10K without any consultation with me. Judges and advocates work hand in gloves and do not follow any process.

24.09

Birthday visitation. She did not come. I learnt that prev judge had got promoted as principal judge to different court. New judge asked me to file application 

1.10 

Application filed seeking compliance of court orders. Dasti done.

17.10

Hearing date. Asked to pay 75K arrears immediately. Court did not intervene while the OP thug lawyer miscalculated. I was in-person and did whatever I could as a newbie.

22.10

Met child for the first time. His curious eyes piercing my face. His not leaving my toy cars for a moment and finally fighting with his mother to take them with him. His carbon copy face. What cruelty to the child to be separated from his father. How sad when a father is not able to meet his kid. There was physical attack on me from OP advocates, OP putting false allegations of molestation, child abuse and what not. It must have been terribly crushing for the enemy to let the child meet the father despite getting a reward of 75K. Only time will tell if the enemies of the child succeed in the dark age or jedi warrior of light won even at the peak of night. 

The child does not just look like me but roasts like me as well - only my child could have roasted his father in first meeting at age of 3 by telling his father "shararat nai karni". I was supposed to say that to him but somehow he found the perfect opportunity to tell me that after the physical attack on me and I could just accept his suggestion without rebuttal. He made me proud by taking my gifts with him. His ability to take my gifts with him show his indomitable fighting spirit and passion for winning. Many positives. One negative is is he kept the ball in his hand and tried his best to convince me that the ball is with a child standing far away from us and that he has lost the ball. I could see the ball in his had and I found it so cute that he is smart and trying to fool his father. Later on, it hurt me also that he is blaming an innocent child and lying to me. This is not right but blame is on the environment in which he is growing. He need to stop lying. His cute habits may become his nature as he grows. Also, a lot of anxiety on when I'd meet him next. Also, the way mother dragged him to PS from his arm, did not take him lap at all, his average looking clothes. black threads in his neck, and a child with lot of desires and unfulfilled wishes, it must sure be sin to bear children for the child chose me but I chose a bad mother for him and put him under so much pain.

29.10

Court refused to accept application of assault, has accepted application for increase in access and lesser hostility during visitation.

5.12

Lesson - 

1. always keep an index page which tells you what is where in the file. And keep a bookmark slip that points to index page. 

Keep multiple index where numbering breaks. 

Keep all papers neatly organized before appearing in court

Court may ask you several questions. Refuse to answer and say I need to check. I need to discuss my lawyer. I am not capable of answering that at the moment. Dodge all questions. Because courts will attack. 

Links:

1. Issue framing: (https://indiankanoon.org/doc/109340694/)

     (i)      Where the child will be more happy.

     (ii)     Who is in a better position to look after the physical and
              mental development of the minor.

     (iii)    Who can give more comfort.

     (iv)     In whose care the welfare of the minor is more secure.

     (v)      Who has the capacity to provide for a better education and
              round the clock look after the child.

     (vi)     Who would be available by the side of the child when in
              need.

(vii) Who would look after the emotional aspect, social setup, good education, career building and nurturing of the child as a good human being.

(viii) Where the child will have congenial atmosphere, healthy for his growth and overall development.

(ix) Where the child can be developed well, keeping in mind the ethos and as a better Indian citizen.

(x) Where he will develop as a proper human being having progressive attitude and not having constricted thoughts and outlook towards life.

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Psychologist

1. A.C. Verma, Consultant Psychologist of Pt. Deen Dayal Upadhayaya, Institute for the Physically Handicapped - As per the report, the intelligence of the child is found to be within average limits. However, the child can be managed with proper parenting. [In case shared by Gaurav Reja]

2.